Ghosts That We Knew
by PotterHead1996
Summary: Battling her way through grief, Gwen is proclaimed Queen of Camelot and finds herself carrying Arthur's child at the heart of a powerful kingdom, where it would seem someone is trying their best to usurp her. But she still has Leon, Percival and Gaius, her remaining friends. Leon serves his Queen as any knight would, however it's only so long he can ignore his feelings. Leon/Gwen
1. The Queen

_**So this is the prequel to my current Merthur fanfic (I'll Love You Long After You're Gone). This is a possibly line of events that I think may have happened after Arthur's death at Avalon (*sob*). Yeh anyway – it's Gwen/Leon (or at least will be). This one will probably be more slow-going updates wise than my Merthur one, as I've not written as much of this one as I have for the other, and I'm mainly focussing on the Merthur one. Anyway hope you like it :) xxx**_

_**[Link to Merthur sequel: s/10024965/1/I-ll-Love-You-Long-After-You-re-Gone ]  
**_

"The King is dead…Long live the Queen!" Sir Leon's voice echoed round the large hall.

Calls of "Long live the Queen!" resonated back from the gathered Knights and subjects of Camelot.

Gwen bit down hard on her lip until she tasted the metallic tinge of blood. She needed to keep her composure, just for a little longer. She caught Gaius' eye and he gave her a gentle smile that told her to hang in there.

Her muscles were completely tensed with the effort of holding herself together; she was trembling with the sheer determination of remaining calm. Finally the last chorus of "Long live the Queen!" rang out, and the entire hall rose and stood in silence for several minutes out of respect, before Leon gave the nod that dismissed them. As the crowds filtered out in a silence that proved their deep respect over their dead King, Leon turned to Gwen.

"You were brilliant, my lady…" he smiled sadly. She looked up at him and saw her own sorrow and grief reflected in them.

"I need to leave." She whispered. He understood and escorted her quickly to a nearby corridor that was empty. The knight stood hesitantly in the doorway as the Queen of Camelot walked slowly up and down the deserted hallway, looking dreamily into space. '_Funny how it's empty'_, she thought briefly. Leon or Percival must have arranged this in case she'd needed the quiet respite. She stopped pacing and took a deep breath. No tears came.

She'd not shed a single tear since the news. She'd screamed, torn through the castle, into the town, out into the surrounding fields, and collapsed onto the grass, clutching at her hair. Percival and Leon found her an hour later staring blankly into nothingness, but still no tears. Neither had uttered a word but simply helped her back to the castle, supporting her weak body between their own stronger ones. Gaius, Percival and Leon had been her rocks, her foundations on whom she had relied heavily on these past few nightmare-like days. They'd talked with her, came to see her, informed her about everything that was going on and helped her get through each day whilst fighting through their own grief.

Gwen suddenly remembered that Leon was still standing in the doorway and looked up at him. He was staring down at his hands which were folded formally in front of him, his own tears dripping down his face. Arthur had been a good friend, as well as King to him, and with Gwaine and Elyan's recent deaths…she wasn't the only one suffering. Gwen wanted to comfort him but knew she couldn't. It wasn't like she could hug him! That would be improper. Neither could she tell him everything would be okay because she didn't believe that herself.

Sometimes Gwen wished she were still a servant. No one would bat an eyelid if she went to the tavern to try to drown out the sorrow. She could easily have been able to lean on Percival or Leon's strong shoulders for comfort or could sit in Gaius' chambers all day and evening and pour her heart out and not have to rule a kingdom alone...

But she was the Queen of Camelot now. She had to be composed, decent and get through this somehow. If Arthur were here, he could help her. But that was a silly thought. If Arthur were here, there wouldn't be all this heartache and sadness in the first place! Gwen squeezed her eyes shut tight as images of Arthur's cheeky grin and dancing blue eyes flashed across her mind and pierced her heart. She leant against the wall and sank onto the floor, her hands pressed fiercely over her ears.

"My lady…?" Leon's concerned voice came from above her; all Gwen could do was shake her head violently. She heard the clink of Leon's chainmail as he lowered himself to sit next to her. They sat in silence for several moments before Leon spoke softly.

"I wonder where Merlin is now…"

Gwen's eyes opened. _'No doubt lying under a table at a tavern'_ was what Arthur would have wittily replied to Leon, but her mouth remained closed. She only spoke when necessary these days. Gwen suddenly realised that she hadn't thought much about Merlin recently. How selfish of her! How on earth was _he _coping, wherever he was? He'd been Arthur's best friend longer than she'd been his wife. Since the day a short letter had arrived for her, informing Camelot of the news that had sent her world crashing down, Gwen had not heard from Merlin. How, when and where Arthur had died had been included in the letter, as well as the assurance that he'd had a King's funeral. He'd also informed her that Morgana was no longer a threat. But no details as to what Merlin planned to do with himself. Maybe he would return to Camelot one day…she hoped he would. She would have liked to talk with him, especially now she had managed to get Gaius to tell her all about him and his magic.

Percival entered the corridor and stopped at the sight of the Queen of Camelot sat on the floor. He looked at Leon next to her, who gave him the usual nod that told Percival Gwen was having one of her particularly painful moments. He stood for a few seconds more before joining them on the floor on Gwen's other side. Percival played with his hands, thinking about Gwaine. Gwaine would've said something to lighten the mood and make everything better. He sighed heavily as all three of them thought about the lives that had been lost.

* * *

The atmosphere was not a happy one when Gaius found them half an hour later in much the same position.

"Forgive me your majesty, but I do think you need to eat something."

Gwen glanced at Gaius and gave him a fleeting sad smile before rising slowly to her feet, the two knights following suit.

Gaius walked Gwen to her chambers, before patting her shoulder.

"Time can heal all wounds." He said in his wise voice. Gwen just looked at him, gave him another small smile before entering hers and Arthur's chambers. She shut the door slowly and was left alone in the big room.

A shiver ran down her spine, but the room was perfectly warm with a fire blazing in the fireplace. Barely glancing at the fine spread of food on the table, Gwen walked to the window. It was a beautiful sunset, with oranges and pinks merging into one across the sky.

Quietly opening the window, she let the cool evening breeze soothe her. Several times she'd done this, considering jumping down, down, down to the hard ground below. Today was no different. Would it really matter if she leapt out? It was only a matter of seconds and the all-consuming grief and agony she felt would be gone, she'd be with her Arthur again in less than a minute. She hitched her great skirts up and climbed up the little step to lean out further. However as usual, this was as far as she got. She wasn't scared of the jump or death, not one bit. But it was at this point that she remembered her duty. She was Queen of Camelot now, they needed her to be there and to be strong. Guinevere needed to lead the kingdom and bring it out of the dark reverie it had been stuck in since the battle of Camlann.

She sat down on the window's ledge, burying her head in her hands. Something like sobs shook her body but her eyes remained dry. She wanted to cry, to let it all out, but she couldn't. Why? It frustrated her. A sudden rage coursed through her body. Grabbing a nearby jug she threw it across the room, bursting into a scream of sadness and anger! The earthenware jug shattered against the wall, spilling its contents of water down onto the table and cloth below. Why had Arthur left her alone? How could he do this to her? He'd said he would come back to her on their last night together! He'd said he would come back just like he always did. Why wasn't he here? Why wasn't he sat in his chair, making fun of Merlin, and sending her those breath taking smiles from across the table? Why wasn't he holding her in his arms, kissing her neck, telling her how much he loved her? Gwen threw the plate of food across the room, shouting out again in an ear-splitting scream of grief.

The doors slammed open and Leon, Percival and several other knights burst in, brandishing their swords. They stopped when they saw the Queen was alone.

"Your majesty? Is everything…" Percival trailed off, looking from the woman whose hands were curled into trembling fists, to the remnants of a meal and a jug of water streaked across the wall and floor. He nodded to the other knights to leave. Sheathing their swords they bowed quickly to Gwen before exiting the dramatic scene.

"My lady, I think you need to sit down…" Percival led her over to a spare chair. Arthur's chair.

"NO!" she pushed his gentle hands off her arm and backed away from the chair. "Not his chair…" she whispered by way of explanation. "I'm sorry." She said to Percival who had looked a little alarmed and even hurt at her sudden outburst against his help.

"No, forgive me, my lady…I didn't realise…" a look of guilt mingled with sadness passed across his face.

"Oh Percival…it's not your fault…" she spoke sadly before she bent to pick up the shards of plate and clay. Neither Leon or Percival stood for this.

"My lady, let us do it!"

"Be careful, highness, they could be sharp!"

Gwen gave them such a ferocious glare that they blinked in shock for a moment or two before silently helping her.

A knock came at the door.

"Enter." Gwen called. Her maidservant, Elayne walked through, carrying freshly laundered clothes for Gwen.

"Oh my lady! Let me help you!" the quiet girl gasped.

Gwen watched the young girl put the clothing down and rush over. Now there were four of them clearing up the results of Gwen's loss of control. This was ridiculous.

With the little crowd of them in the small space, kneeling down to clear up the pot, Leon lost his balance and fell backwards, landing with a bump on his posterior.

Percival chuckled whilst Elayne looked at the knight, who was in an undignified heap on the floor, in surprise. Even Gwen managed a weak smile.

"Do be careful, Sir Leon." She said, turning back to the clearing up, which was nearly done.

Leon's mouth twitched. "Yes my lady."


	2. The Horse Ride

_**Hope you guys like this fic too! :) xxx**_

_The moon was full and bright and stars were glittering. Arthur's hands rested on Gwen's waist as he stood behind her._

_He nuzzled his face into her curly hair and breathed in._

"_I love you Guinevere…" he murmured into her ear, his lips just grazing it. Gwen shivered with delight._

"_I love you too, Arthur. With all my heart." She whispered back, smiling into the night. A light breeze fluttered her night gown around her ankles and she leant back into the strong man who wrapped his arms around her, holding her as close to him as possible. She sighed, "Don't you ever let me go."_

_She heard a soft, deep chuckle. _

"_There's no chance of that, Guinevere!"_

"_Arthur?"_

"_Yes, Guinevere?"_

_She laughed a little. "Why do you keep using my full name?"_

"_Because my love, your name to me is like when a man who's been deaf all his life, hears music for the first time. It's the sound of wedding bells to a newlywed couple. It's the sound of the dawn chorus welcoming a beautiful sunset…" he paused before laughing a throaty chuckle, "It's the sound of the dinner call to Gwaine."_

_Tears were glistening in Gwen's eyes. "It's the way that I am able to say it, I can say it knowing that you are Guinevere, my Guinevere. That is why I keep saying your name."_

_She turned in his arms to see his crystal blue eyes smiling at her, the faint laughter lines showing at the corners. His mouth was curved into his perfect crooked smile that always made her breath catch. Gwen's fingers absentmindedly traced the outline of his strong jaw, brushing over his lips before trailing down his neck and coming to rest on his broad chest. Arthur's arms tightened around her and he leant in, whispering her name over and over to both himself and her._

"_Gwen…my Guinevere…I will always love you…" His lips brushed over hers gently…_

Gwen sat up ram-rod straight in her bed. Her heart was hammering. Touching her fingers to her mouth, Gwen swore she had felt his lips on hers. Curling her hands into fists, she thumped down on the side of the bed, which happened to be made of cold hard stone. She drew her throbbing hand close to her chest as it ached.

Since the battle, Gwen had not slept in the great bed. She would not sleep in it without Arthur. The bed was _theirs_. Not hers, _theirs! _

Weak sunlight crept through the large windows, just about lighting the large room with the dawn glow. Already Gwen could hear movement through the castle. Quietly she listened to the servants bustling about, the chink of chainmail as knights moved through the grounds below and the absence of Arthur's deep breathing…

She shook her head violently. She was Queen of Camelot now. Sad thoughts could be dwelt upon later, but right now she had a kingdom to run. And she must run it well. Gwen was determined that the kingdom Arthur had built would not fall to pieces, especially not under her rule.

Not bothering to wait for Elayne to arrive and help, Gwen dressed herself in a simple but pretty dress, pinned her hair back hastily and placed a simple gold headband over her head that showed her authority, yet didn't shove it in people's faces.

She glanced at herself in the mirror. It had been three weeks since the coronation and Gwen could see dark shadows under her chocolate brown eyes and she looked a little drained of colour. This wouldn't do. There would be whispers that she was unfit to be Queen if she let her emotions and thoughts take their toll on her. Pinching her cheeks had little effect, so Gwen decided a brisk walk round the grounds or even to the stables would bring a little colour to her pallor.

* * *

Smiling sweetly at the curtsies and bows she received as she moved through the castle, she found herself growing a little annoyed. How had Arthur borne all this politeness and formality all his life? Maybe that was why he'd found her reprimand in Ealdor all those years ago so refreshing. A small smile appeared as she recalled that moment.

"Guine_vere!_" he had said, before smiling a little. "Thank-you."

She still felt mortified that she'd spoken like that to a Prince when she had been just a servant, but Arthur had assured her several months ago, when they'd been reminiscing one evening, that he'd desperately needed someone to do that. She bit her lip. It had only been several months ago, how things were different now.

Gwen walked quietly through the kitchens, an unusual route for a Queen of Camelot, one might think, but the kitchen staff were used to it. Once a servant herself, Gwen often forgot to walk through the castle via the grander doors and passageways. Instead she would absentmindedly stroll where she used to work and if it wasn't for the elegant dresses and headbands, nobody would notice her.

"My lady," Helen, the newest addition to the Camelot kitchens curtsied and looked a little flustered. She was the only one not used to the Queen's presence in the kitchens. Gwen nodded kindly and wandered over to the rolls of bread from the previous day that no one had wanted. Her stomach rumbled a little as her hand strayed towards one.

"Oi! No one takes my bread rolls!" came the familiar reprimand. She looked up into the twinkling eyes of the cook. "At least the ones that are stale," she spoke again and gently pressed a freshly baked roll, still warm, into Gwen's hand. An almost smile spread across her face. It felt strange, she hadn't smiled for a while. She felt honoured! Next to no one got away with fresh rolls from the cook! Gwen could remember when she'd been working in the kitchens one day; Merlin had stepped near her pies once and received a slap to the hand with a spoon. His cheeky grin had spread across his face and he'd walked away, yet somehow, she had seen him later munching on one, cramming it into his mouth between errands for Arthur. He'd probably used his magic to steal one. It was a strange thought, that Merlin and the powerful old sorcerer were one and the same, that he'd been the saviour of Camelot and probably Albion on many occasions. Strange that Merlin was the most powerful sorcerer of all time…or so Gaius had told her several weeks ago.

Gwen admitted, she missed Merlin and wished he would return. If anyone could share her grief it was him. But then it would probably worsen his grief being in Camelot, with memories around every corner. At least he could escape from them and move on. She was stuck here, seeing Arthur's ghost every night in her vivid dreams, feeling his hand in hers when she sat on the throne to discuss matters of aiding the villages destroyed or manipulated by Morgana and hearing his laugh when Leon or Percival dropped something or tripped.

Gwen blinked and realised she had strayed to the stables near the courtyard. Quietly, she walked to where her horse, Alisdair was stabled. She ate most of the bread and fed the rest to the happy looking creature.

Most of Camelot was just waking and the sun was new in the sky. Gwen breathed in the cool air and looked for someone to help her put a saddle on Alisdair. Of course William, the 15 year old stable-boy insisted he must do it himself and that she, the Queen, mustn't trouble herself with doing such labour. Gwen graciously stepped back and in a short time, Alisdair was standing there, saddled and looking at her with expectant eyes. Glad of the simple dress she had chosen, she easily climbed into the saddle and settled down, comfortable in the familiarity of it.

The Queen could not travel outside of the castle without an escort, or at least she would cause a panic if she did, so Guinevere contented herself to trot round and round the courtyard waiting until she spotted a knight or two who was willing and ready to ride out for a bit.

It was about her 5th turn of the large area, when a familiar and friendly voice called across to her.

"My lady! Surely you must be dizzy by now!"

Twisting in her saddle, she saw Leon and Percival descending the steps. She was glad it was these two. Not that she'd have minded had it been some other knights, but Leon and Percival had seemingly always been in Camelot and were a comfort to her. She looked on them as family. They were like her kind if ever so slightly mischievous elder brothers, who would beat up any man who had the audacity to even look at her. But she wouldn't dare tell them this. They reminded her of Elyan, her own dear brother she had lost not so long ago…another heavy loss.

"Care to explain why you're carving out a track round the courtyard with poor Alisdair's hooves, my lady?" Leon grinned up as they reached her. Unable to help herself, Gwen smiled back. The poor knight blinked in shock, he'd not seen her smile for weeks. Maybe she was having a good day, maybe she was beginning to cope, maybe she was smiling because she was happy to see him. Immediately he shook his head, his curls bouncing.

"My lady is there anything you need? Or would you like to continue your _thrilling_ tour of the square alone?"

Gwen raised her eyebrows and sighed. "_Please_ take me out of here!" she groaned. "And soon, otherwise I shall behead the next person who asks if I am 'quite alright'!" She added in a conspiratorial whisper.

Leon smiled and turned towards the stables. Percival nudged him as they walked away; Leon shoved him in retaliation before glancing back at Gwen who rolled her eyes at them.

* * *

With the two knights on their trusty steeds, they made their way through the streets of Camelot, people stopping to bow their heads in respect, before the trio emerged into the lush green fields surrounding the town. Gwen inhaled deeply, the scent of grasses, flowers and wood smoke from the town filled her senses. Home. This was the smell of home.

She could feel every inch of her body yearning to charge through the countryside of the kingdom of Camelot on her horse's back, and even Alisdair seemed to quiver with excitement.

"Forgive me," she said to the two knights a few feet behind, as she rearranged her skirts so that she could move her leg to ride like a man, the knights looked away awkwardly as she did so. "Are you ready, Alisdair?" she whispered to her horse once she was settled. He whickered quietly in reply. With another rare smile (she really was in a better mood today), she dug her heels in and they flew off.

Trees, fields, little farms sped past and the wind whipped the loose curls around her head delightfully. She grinned into the wind, happy memories of similar rides with Arthur swimming through her mind.

Eventually they slowed to a gentle trot, passing through a forest path that took them on a circular route back to Camelot. Ahead they saw a small family, apparently taking a stroll. They were all laughing, the mother holding her eldest daughter's hand, the father carrying the littlest child on his shoulders and the other children racing ahead. Gwen's heart warmed at the sight. The young child was using his advantageous height to reach some leaves in a tree when suddenly he leant a little too far. With a cry, he fell.

It all happened so fast that Gwen didn't quite realise what had happened at first. She had seen the boy fall…but now he was hovering in the air, inches away from the ground. Gwen frowned in confusion, until she saw the eldest girl's outstretched hand, and a golden glow leaving her eyes. Magic.

The mother ran forward, plucked him from the air and held the little boy close to her, scolding him for being so silly, but her eyes were relieved all the same. That is until she caught sight of the Queen with two of her knights watching them from behind. The woman gasped and clapped her spare hand to her mouth. The father, turning and seeing Gwen, moved immediately in front of his daughter, who had the look of a trapped rabbit in her eyes. Gwen frowned in confusion until she realised. They must think that she was about to take their daughter away for the crime of sorcery. But Guinevere held no such prejudices. Instead she simply urged her horse to walk calmly on. As they passed, Gwen smiled kindly down at the girl, hiding behind her father. And they simply continued on. As they moved further away, Gwen could vaguely hear the family talking to each other in shocked voices.

"But that…that was the Queen! That was Queen Guinevere! She saw…didn't she?"

"Aye, she saw alright…"

"Then why didn't she…why is Lizzie still…"

Gwen was nearly out of earshot, but she heard the father speak again, with respect, admiration and gratefulness in his voice. "She saw. She just has different principles…"

Gwen felt another smile beginning to spread across her face. A strange sensation grew within her, and she suddenly had an overwhelming feeling that Arthur would have been proud of her impulsive decision.

Glancing behind at the two men riding at her side, she saw that they both wore odd expressions. Of respect and great esteem.


	3. The Law

_**Hope you enjoy this fic :) reviews would be loverly! :D xxx**_

As soon as they clattered into the courtyard an hour later, Gwen leapt down off of her horse. Her chief advisor, Elidor came down the steps to greet her.

"My lady-"

"I would like to convene a meeting with the other court advisors and knights, please."

He blinked in surprise. "My lady? May I inquire as to why?"

"You may, but I will tell you when we are at the round table."

Elidor looked towards the knights, who had now dismounted their own horses, and were patting them and talking to each other, with smiles on their faces.

"Well? What's happened?" he inquired, worrying a little. The Queen did not usually stride into the castle demanding meetings. Percival looked up.

"No need to worry, my Lord. The Queen has merely made a decision of her own."

"A decision over what?!" he called in exasperation, but the knights simply walked the horses away to the stables.

* * *

"My lords and knights." Guinevere called over the low murmur of curious voices, silencing them. "You must all be wondering why I have called this meeting. I can assure you now, that there is no danger or problem you should worry about." Elidor immediately looked relieved and fanned his face with his hand. Really! He did easily get into panics.

"I have come to a decision that is all, regarding one of Camelot's laws." Elidor frowned again and looked up, as did most of the room.

This was it. The moment Camelot had been waiting for, the outcome Gwen felt that Arthur would have soon come to and was willing her to declare.

"I have decided that the law of Camelot that states those who practice magic are subject to imprisonment or a death sentence…should be abolished."

There was silence for a minute or two, before it broke into an uproar. Knights and lords who'd had bad experiences of magic stood, declaring this to be folly, others who agreed with the Queen, arguing with them, gesturing wildly with their hands. Gwen rolled her eyes, and slammed her hand down. Silence once again fell. She heard Arthur's voice in her own.

"Magic is not bad, but the hearts of men! Not all who practice magic use it for evil! It depends entirely upon the person."

"But my lady! We have not seen such a person who practices magic for good! Think about the late Kings. Both dead as a result of the evils of magic!" a lord called out.

Gwen winced when he mentioned 'the late kings'. Leon's fists tightened as he saw the pain return to her face. _Damn_ that lord!

"My lord, if you are willing to listen, I am confident the Queen can give evidence." Leon's deep voice was tense, holding a light warning in it. The lord's gaze flickered to him and looked down, away from the fierce gaze. Gwen nodded and smiled her thanks at him.

"Yes. Yes I can. I know of a man, whose magical ability I only learnt about several weeks ago." Leon frowned and leaned forward. He'd been expecting her to talk of the young girl from the morning's ride.

"This man has served Camelot and Albion for many years, dedicating his magic to the protection of…Arthur." Her voice faltered slightly at his name, but she continued none-the-less. "He hid his abilities, taking great pains and dangers to do so. But everything he ever did was for Arthur. Everything he did was for the good of the King and of Camelot. Even when he knew he could be found out and executed, he used his magic and risked his life to save Arthur countless times. This man's heart was good and full of pure intentions."

Murmurs ran round the table, as the men wondered who it could possibly have been. Gwen carried on. "He is the last Dragonlord. The greatest sorcerer this land has ever and probably will ever see. He is responsible for the death of Morgana and alongside Arthur and the knights, he is the bravest man to have walked this land. He is all the evidence you need to prove that magic itself is not evil. But I could give other examples, if you insist!"

Several lords and knights called out at the same time.

"This sorcerer you speak of, who is he?"

"Tell us his name!"

"His name! What is it?!"

Gwen raised her chin, took a breath. "His name…Merlin."

Leon and Percival stared at Gwen with shock and disbelief, as did the entire court.

"_Merlin?"_ Percival breathed incredulously. Smiles were growing across both knight's faces.

"Of course! It _would_ be Merlin! How did we not see it?!" Leon laughed in astonishment. He looked up to Percival and laughed again. "You realise don't you?"

Percival grinned back. "Of course! We owe Merlin our lives…countless times probably!"

Leon shook his head. "I wish we could have thanked him somehow. All he did…and for no gratitude."

"He has our gratitude now, whether he knows it or not. He has Camelot's deepest gratitude and trust." Gwen spoke.

Another lord looked up at the Queen.

"Merlin may be an example of a good sorcerer, but that does not rule out the evil ones. Camelot has seen much more evil sorcery than it has good. Morgana, Morgause, Nimueh to name but a few…"

Gwen nodded. "I know. I do not say that all magic is used for good, but neither is it all used for evil."

She glanced round the court, taking in their still stunned expressions. "I do not suggest that we allow sorcerers to do as they will, I am simply saying that they should no longer live in fear for something they were born with. It is not a crime to have magic, it is a crime to use that magic for evil." Many of the heads in the room nodded in agreement. "We should abolish this law. And if someone tries to harm myself or the people of Camelot with their magic, then they will face punishment for their actions. However I will no longer have innocent men, women and sometimes children executed or imprisoned for merely having the ability of magic. As I said earlier, magic is not bad, but the hearts of men!" She finished, taking in a breath.

Elidor looked round the table with a calculating look, before he turned to smile up at her. "Those who agree to the abolishment of this law, raise your hand."

And to Guinevere's amazement every hand in the room, however slowly or hesitantly, was raised. She let out a short exhalation of air that was nearly a laugh, before composing herself.

"Then let it be done." She spoke in her authoritative voice. It felt good to use her queenly power for once; she must do it more often. Raising her chin a little, Gwen surveyed the room, taking in the men who were now discussing Merlin. She decided she must take on more of her duties herself. It was only because she was a woman and an ex-servant - a Pendragon only by marriage - that she'd had to have so many advisors doing most of the jobs that she, the Queen, should have had full responsibility for. Well, Gwen would show _them_. She was determined to make her dear Arthur proud; she would rule Camelot with a just and fair hand and would earn her Pendragon name herself. In that instant a thrill went through her, a thrill that Arthur had only ever induced in her, when he'd held her. Gwen would rule this kingdom and she would make Arthur proud.

* * *

The next few days, saw many strange things happen. Families from all over the kingdom of Camelot travelled to the castle, begging to be able to personally give their gratitude and vows of loyalty to the just and fair-minded Queen of Camelot, some even offering their magical services to her, should she ever be in need. Dozens of letters came, extending their humble apologies for ever thinking ill of the house of Pendragon and many people whom Gwen knew personally, shocked her by confessing their abilities. But the event that stuck most in Gwen's mind was the arrival of a certain letter.

It arrived one morning, three days after the proclamation and official signing of the new law. Gwen had been smiling politely and nodding, she had not been feeling too good for most of the morning but she was graciously accepting the thanks of an old woman whose grandson, they'd just found out, had magic, They'd been extremely worried for a few days but the Queen's declaration was like 'a gift from heaven!' At that moment, the man who had been hastily appointed to deliver the letters of gratitude to the Queen arrived with another bulging satchel. The older woman curtsied and left, still saying how thankful and happy she was. Gwen took a letter at random and opened it. It was an extremely short letter, in familiar, scrawled handwriting.

It simply said:

'_Well done, Gwen. Arthur would be proud. You have my thanks and undying loyalty._

_ M'_

There was no guessing who the _'M'_ was. Gwen clutched the letter to her heart, before racing to Gaius' chambers and thrusting the letter at him. His eyes lit up with joy at the short bit of correspondence with the man who was like a son to him.

"Do you think he will ever come back?" Gwen asked the older man.

"I hope so, my lady, I sincerely hope so."

Gwen took the letter back and hastily ran in the direction of her chambers, intending to pin it to the wall above the ground where she slept, when she stopped, a few doors away from her rooms. Resting her hand on the wall, she clutched at her stomach. An awful feeling of nausea overcame her.

Shuddering, Gwen knelt to the floor. Her stomach heaved. She had to get to her chambers and to her wash basin, otherwise some unlucky person standing beneath the closest window to her was about to get a disgusting surprise.

"Gw- My lady?!" Leon's voice spoke in alarm from behind her.

"Leon! I'm afraid I need-" she felt the sickness welling up and her last sentence came out more like a shriek than a calm requirement, "-I need your aid!"

Immediately the young man knelt beside her and putting his arm round her back, he carefully helped her to her feet. "Where?" he asked, there was no time for formality at the moment.

"My- my chambers!"

Leon helped her walk the short distance to her rooms, Gwen leaning on him heavily but as soon as they were in the room she let go, dashing over to the wash basin in the corner. She began to vomit, and Leon, not knowing what else to do, went over and held her long curly hair back for her, making soothing noises.

When her heaving stopped and he was sure she would not throw up any more, he gently led her over to the large bed, and gently settled her down.

"I will fetch Gaius…er…just wait there, my lady."

Gwen smiled weakly. "Well I'm not likely to go for a run round the castle grounds, now am I?"

Glad that she was well enough to make sarcastic remarks, Leon hurried away to fetch the wise physician.

* * *

"And can you tell me how long you have been feeling nauseous, my lady? Have you been feeling any other ailments?" Gaius' kind voice spoke to her.

"I…I haven't…it sort of came upon me suddenly. Well…actually I experienced some nausea, a few days ago and again, the other day, I think my stomach disagreed with the venison in the meals from the nights before. Unless…I don't have anything infectious, do I Gaius?"

He frowned and looked deep in thought.

"My lady…if it does not seem too…well…personal, how long ago was your last monthly bleeding?"

Gwen's eyes widened in surprise as her cheeks flushed. Flustered she began counting back, "…um well…let me see…" soon her voice trailed away…

The dawn of realisation came over her features. "I…I meant to have one last week, but I didn't…" she gave a short laugh. "I didn't realise I'd skipped it! And…and I missed the one before that...I just…I just thought that it was due to the stress and shock of the battle and…everything else… but that means I haven't had one for about nine weeks!" it was barely more than a whisper. She laughed at the shock. "Nine weeks!" she repeated. Her hands flew to her abdomen. "It can't be! It's…" she laughed again. "Gaius, tell me I'm not getting carried away…"

Gaius smiled at her. "My lady, I do believe you are with child."


	4. The Sickness

_**Sorry for a long gap in updates! Hope you like this too. If you've not already done so, you could check out my other story, 'I'll Love You Long After You're Gone', which is Merthur and is pretty much a sequel to this – in that this Leovere story all happens, and then the Merthur one follows on in the 21**__**st**__** century when Arthur returns with several other familiar faces…**_

_**Xxx**_

Soon after Queen Guinevere, with Gaius at her side, had made the official statement that the house of Pendragon was expecting an heir, it was all the entire castle and town could talk about. Servants whispered, speculating whether it would be a boy or girl, the maids giggled about whether the child would look like Arthur and some of the elder members of the court discussed whether it would have the Queen's gentle temperament or the late King's mischievous ways. Gwen herself seemed to smile more and more, placing her hand on her stomach every now and then, as if to feel her connection to Arthur was authentic and still there. Camelot's famous cook ensured more than enough food was made for Gwen. The poor Queen found she often had to send a lot of it back, because she was already full before she'd eaten even a third of the enormous spread! Other times, she called in Percival or Leon if they were on guard duty outside her chambers to take a bit, so that Cook wouldn't be too insulted.

The down-side to the good news was that, whilst she was ecstatic that she was having a child, Arthur's child, Gwen felt distraught at the same time. Somehow she couldn't help feeling even more heartbroken that her beloved Arthur had not known he would have an heir before he-...before he died. What was even worse was knowing that he'd never be able to set eyes on his child. It was infuriating to feel both pure joy and such misery simultaneously.

The battling emotions within her meant that her temper was shorter than it had been in a long while.

"My Lord Elidor! I do not care whether the inner corridors are lined with tapestries or not! Please, just do as you see fit, but do not bother me with such trifling matters!" she snapped one particularly humid day as she was sorting through the enormous pile of papers that detailed Camelot's grain supplies from the previous year. Percival looked away uncomfortably.

"Er…y-yes your highness…" the poor man stuttered, bowing as he hastily made his way out of the room, presumably to inform the seamstresses of Camelot to create some fine tapestries, should the Queen decide she wanted them in the end.

Giving an exasperated sigh, Gwen threw the papers back onto the table and leant back in her chair, her hand drifting towards her still flat stomach.

Percival coughed awkwardly. "My lady…perhaps a ride out on Alisdair would refresh your mind?"

Gwen looked outside at the sunlight. "Perhaps you're right. Send word to William to ready my horse please." With a nod, Percival swept out and Gwen rose and went to her chambers with Elayne to change into a more suitable dress.

* * *

Soon they were galloping through the surrounding fields and trees, the warm air stilling Guinevere's irritation. After slowing to a stop to allow the horses to drink at a nearby stream, Gwen looked around at the accompanying knights.

"Where's Leon…I mean _Sir_ Leon?" she frowned. Percival looked up from his saddle bag which he'd just been reaching into to get his oil-skin of water.

"He was feeling unwell, my lady. I made him inform Gaius who told him to spend the day in bed. Several others have taken a bad turn as well."

Gwen pulled a face. "Why have I not been informed of this sickness?"

"Gaius thought that there weren't enough cases to cause panic by labelling it infectious, your highness." Percival shrugged.

"Well I'll give Gaius a piece of my mind that'll cause panic alright!" Gwen muttered darkly to herself. Percival overheard and gave a deep chuckle. Gwen didn't like the absence of one of her most trusted knights and friends. It felt odd somehow to have only Percival beside her and no Leon.

* * *

On their return to the castle however, Leon was up and about, dressed in his usual chainmail and cloak, waiting for their return.

"Riding out without me? My lady, I am offended!" he smiled up at her, warmly.

Pulling her eyebrows into a concerned frown, Gwen shook her head.

"But Percival said you were ill and resting?"

"I am much better now, my lady. I fear Gaius was overreacting."

Her eyes narrowed at him, he seemed paler than usual but his polite smile was unwavering.

"If you insist…"

* * *

Back inside the castle, Gwen sat back down to sort through the papers she had left. Surprisingly, they had all been sorted neatly into a pile, with a short account of it all written on some parchment on the top.

"Who…?" She looked closer and recognised Elidor's handwriting. Maybe he had done her a favour, she _was_ tired after all, but she still felt that he'd taken it upon himself to do her job for her, and she didn't like that. So she began to leaf through it, double checking his careful work. At least she now didn't feel as useless.

Standing at the required distance from Gwen's seat at the long table, Leon bit his lip. He was still shivering; it had not desisted as he'd expected it to. Percival glanced at him from his position across the room. He sent a concerned nod, which Leon dismissed with a passive smile and shrug. So maybe he wasn't feeling as great he'd said, but he wasn't spending the day in bed like a wimp, and it wasn't as if he was at death's door. No doubt Gaius would give him one of his famous frowns later, but Sir Leon wasn't going back to bed. He was a knight of the round table, a knight of Camelot and he was a man! Nothing would send him crawling back under his sheets, no shivers…or cold sweats…or aches.

Uncomfortably, he rolled his shoulders, trying to dissipate the awful pain gathering in his muscles.

Percival was staring at him intently now. 'You alright?' he mouthed. Leon nodded and smiled back, though it felt more like a grimace. He looked back towards Gwen, who was still sorting through the papers. He was going to stand guard all night if she needed it and he wasn't backing down. Gritting his teeth, Leon blinked furiously. His vision was beginning to swirl slightly. Well perhaps he would excuse himself if she _did_ decide to spend the night here. Curling and uncurling his hands into fists, Leon concentrated on breathing calmly and standing steady, as an overwhelming dizziness threatened to topple him. What was wrong with him?

"Leon? What's wrong? Are you feeling unwell again?" Gwen's alarmed voice sounded foggy, distant.

"Nothing, my lady, its noth-" Leon lost his balance and in a fit of giddiness, collapsed to the floor. The last thing he remembered were cool hands on his forehead as the colours and voices blurred into a spinning blackness that overcame him.

* * *

"Gaius what's wrong with him? And don't tell me it's nothing to worry about, several other cases have been reported in the past few hours making this an epidemic and you know it!"

The elderly physician shook his head slowly as he crushed some herbs and flower petals together with a mortar and pestle. "I'm not one hundred per cent sure, my lady…but I fear…"

"What? What is it?"

"I fear it may be the sweating sickness…"

Gwen's hand flew to her mouth. "But that's been known to wipe out the population of entire kingdoms! It…it can be deadly!"

Gaius's kind eyes looked over to her. "Our best hope is to contain and nurse all the cases in one area, and forbid access except to care for them. It will slow and perhaps prevent the spread."

Gwen nodded, placing another cool cloth over Leon's burning forehead. She bit down on her lower lip, hard. Not Leon_. Not Leon._ She didn't think she could bear another loss.

Elyan, Arthur and Gwaine's deaths, as well as the absence of Merlin, had all but killed her. It was the little baby growing inside her that was getting her through the long days now, but she couldn't endure the loss of Leon too. It was Leon, Percival and Gaius that Gwen could talk to, laugh with, trust. These three men had been her rocks, her cornerstones, her crutches to lean on in the last painful month. _Not Leon!_

The sound of Percival's pacing outside the door echoed slightly round the room. He needed Leon as much as Gwen did. Fate couldn't be as cruel as to let the knight succumb to the illness, could it?

"Percival?" Gwen called out to him and he immediately entered, his eyes flickering to Leon first and then to her.

"My lady?" his voice was strained.

"You need something to do. Please inform Elidor he is to arrange for all the cases of the sweating sickness, to be moved to a single clean area, and that he is to forbid access to all but those who are to care for the patients." Percival nodded. "And Percival…please could you help him with the task?" She smiled a reassuring smile up at him. The poor man needed to be occupied; he'd wear the floor down outside Gaius's chambers otherwise.

"Yes my lady…thank-you." He turned to leave but he paused in the doorway, looking back at the man who was like a brother to him. "You will…you will send word if…if his condition worsens, my lady?"

"Of course, Perce."

Percival smiled at his Queen, not noticing she had used his nickname, before walking swiftly out.

"My lady, you must remove yourself from this room, you daren't come down with it for you and the baby's sake." Gaius moved towards the sickbed she was seated next to, with a vial of green liquid in his hands.

"Gaius you know I cannot! Is there some sort of protection against the sickness? A posy of herbs, perhaps?"

Gaius's eyebrow flickered up at the mention of the 'posy'. He spoke as he lifted the knight's head to pour the liquid into his mouth. "Well my lady…I have been researching such ailments as these, and I do believe it has something to do with the air surrounding the patient and contact. It seems the sickness can transfer that way. Perhaps a cloth could be worn over your nose and mouth? And do keep your hands clean, my lady."

After fixing such a cloth to her face, Gwen settled back down in the chair beside Leon's cot. The accounts could be sorted through another time, besides; Elidor had done them for her. She would just have to content herself with the vow she would do the next load on her own.

Changing the cloth on Leon's forehead, she placed her hand on her stomach again, looking for her reassurance. If only Arthur were here, he would be able to help her keep calm.

"Forgive me, my lady, but I must see to the other patients now." Gaius picked up a tray and placed several vials of the green liquid on it. Gwen gave him an assuring smile and told him she would be quite alright on her own for a bit and with that, Gaius hurried out.

Sighing, Gwen leant back in her chair and looked down at the sleeping man. His straw-coloured curls stuck to his temples and forehead as his head turned from side to side feverishly. Automatically she brushed the locks of hair out of his face with one hand as the other rested over her baby. Eventually he stilled but she continued to stroke his hair gently. He had looked after her not so long ago when she'd had her first real bout of morning sickness, so it was her turn now.

"Don't you dare leave us, Leon. Don't you _dare_." She whispered softly. "You are a knight of Camelot! The kingdom cannot do without you…and neither can Percival or I…" he moaned softly in his sleep, his face scrunching up in pain. "I'll give you a whole day off if you recover!" she joked, trying to keep some positivity. Oh how she wished for Arthur, again. He would tell her it would be alright, reassure her she had made the right decision over containing the cases, hold her to him and rub his hand gently over her belly…

Shaking her head, Gwen reprimanded herself. She needed to stop feeling self-pity and sorrow! The people of Camelot needed her, _Leon_ needed her. With a trained hand, she took the cloth from Leon's head and rinsed it in cold water before replacing it.

"Gwen…Guinevere…" the whisper from him was so quiet, she nearly missed it. She blinked in surprise.

"Yes, I'm here. You're alright, you're going to be fine, Leon." His face contorted into a frown before he began tossing and turning again, saying her name once more. Gwen shook her head fondly. He was a loyal knight indeed if his feverish worries were over her.

* * *

The afternoon grew into evening, the evening began to darken into night and Gwen had been lightly dozing in her chair, her hand still stroking the soft coils in Leon's hair comfortingly.

A small noise drew her attention back into the room, opening her eyes she looked around. She'd heard a soft snore. Percival had obviously returned whilst she'd drifted off, and was now sitting on the floor leaning against the other side of Leon's bed. He had fallen asleep. A tender smile played on her lips at the picture of them all. They really did look like a little family, all curled up around the ill Leon. Gwen rose and took a cushion from her chair.

Moving round to Percival, she leant over and placed it beneath his sleeping head, so that he would be more comfortable. She looked down at the two knights; she really couldn't do without them. Sitting down once again on the side of Leon's bed, she took both Percival's hand and Leon's and held them close to her. A glimmer of happiness came over her, as she sat with the two sleeping men, thinking of Arthur's child within her. Leon's hand gently squeezed hers and she looked over to him. His eyes were open and looking at her with an affectionate smile on his lips, but he still seemed feverish.

"Leon, you're awake! How are you feeling?" she inquired in a quiet voice, so as to not wake Percival.

"I don't feel so bad now, my lady. You just wait; I'll be marching round the castle by tomorrow, stealing one of cook's pies."

Gwen laughed lightly. "You'll do no such thing! You are to remain in bed until you are fully recovered!"

"Didn't I hear you mention earlier I get a day off, my lady?" he chuckled.

Gwen blinked. She hadn't realised he'd heard her, but then if Arthur had when he'd been at death's door all those years ago, why was Leon any different? She smiled back at him.

"That's only if you recover, Sir Leon!"

"Then, my lady, I shall do my best."

"Yes. You will!" they both laughed then, and Leon closed his eyes with a smile, his head leaning back into the pillow. He felt a gentle pressure on his hand as Gwen squeezed it, and that in itself made the pain disappear, for a short while anyway.

Gazing down at him, Gwen took in his peaceful countenance. She'd always thought Leon to be a handsome knight. A smile appeared as she remembered when she'd first come to work in the castle.

She'd been hurrying round a corner and had collided with him. The pile of clothing for Morgana had gone flying and both of them had lost their balance and fallen to the floor.

"Oh I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to- Oh I'm so clumsy!" she'd sputtered, horrified that she'd knocked over a knight in her haste. But Leon had just stared at her for a few seconds before smiling.

"Not to worry, allow me to help you…?"

"Guinevere. But my friends call me Gwen…you can call me Gwen too, if you like…"

Leon had smiled his charmingly polite smile. "Does that make me a friend?"

A blush had crept across her cheeks and she'd busied herself retrieving the strewn out clothing. He gave a chuckle before continuing, "You look familiar…have we met?"

Gwen glanced up and frowned a little before her eyes widened. "Sir Leon? My mother used to work in your household…"

"Gwen! Of course, I remember now. We used to play together, did we not?"

She nodded shyly. "I seem to remember we were quite the trouble-makers."

He gave another chuckle. "Well seeing as we're already friends, you can call me Leon."

She'd looked up at him then. A knight wanted to be her friend? "Well then…um Leon…thank-you for your help. I really do have to be going now though, I was in a rush for a reason!" a grin had somehow materialised on her face, yet she couldn't remember when it had appeared.

He passed her the gathered clothes and stood, holding his hand down to her. Gwen took it gratefully and Leon pulled her gently to her feet.

"Well you'd better be on your way then. I hope to see you around, Gwen…" another captivating smile appeared on his lips and Gwen had felt a little tug at her heart. Inclining his head politely, Leon carried on walking, turning his head back once or twice to smile again at her.

Looking down at him now, Gwen gave a quiet giggle as she thought about how she'd taken a fancy to him all those years ago. He'd not been interested in her she was sure and anyhow, she'd fallen for Arthur in the end…how her heart ached for him now.


End file.
